James Altucher headlines that could have gone another way.

One of the greatest honor one can bestow on another is to make fun of them, at least in my book.  I have nothing but respect for James Altucher.  His headlines are a bit wacky and a some times a reach.  I would describe his headlines as a similar experience as when a paramedic breaks your ribs while saving your life.  You are pissed your ribs are broken but glad your life was saved.  Here are some headlines that could have gone a different way.

How to be THE LUCKIEST GUY ON THE PLANET in 4 Easy Steps

How to be THE FUNKIEST GUY ON THE PLANET in 4 Easy Steps.

James explains that by staying up for hours and hours playing chess and not showering, you too can make people ask. What is that smell?

I’m Completely Humiliated by Yoga.

I’m Completely Humiliated by Yoda.

James talks about the girl he was in love with, was actually in love with Yoda. Making Star Wars hard to watch, a double shot to the heart for a geek.

10 Reasons You Should Never Own Stocks Again

1o Reasons You Should Never Own Socks Again

When you think of James Altucher you do not think high fashion, but even James knows it is not appropriate to wear socks and sandals.  James makes a case that loafers, Croc’s, and Ugg’s are the only shoes to own, eliminating the need for socks.

I Want My Daughters to Be Lesbians

I Want My Daughters to Rastafarians

James points out the safety of this lifestyle will lead to a longer life for his daughters. There are risks of second hand smoke but the relaxed lifestyle is great for heart health.

What it feels like to be Rich

What it feels like to Rich, my Hair stylist.

James explains the intricate relationship he has with his half blind stylist Rich. After beating Rich in a high stakes chess game. Rich was only able to pay him back in haircuts. James will be paid back in 2030, much to the chagrin of his friends and family.

33 Unusual Tips to Being a Better Writer

33 Unusual Tips to Being a Better Waiter

James vast experience with the service industry makes him an expert.  Starting with pizza delivery, to his experience with hookers while at HBO, and now his daily visits to coffee shops.  You won’t want to miss this.

8 Alternatives to College

8 Alternatives to Collage

James explains that collages are so late 90’s, he makes very strong points against it.  The post culminates with what he believes will be the next trend, but why you do not want to start using it.  Or do you?

The 100 Rules for Being an Entrepreneur

The 100,000 Rules for Being an Entrepreneur

James tells you everything you need to know about being an entrepreneur, the kicker, by the time you finish you find out that the Mayans were right.

I am thankful that James has decided to write about some challenging things.  I look forward to continuing to read, laugh, and second guessing my views on the world.

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  • Ha, this is hilarious. How about “the time I screwed Yasser Arafat out of a $2 bill”. You missed that one. Or “10 Unusual THings I learned about Googol” the mathematician.

    • There were some more brutal ones that I left out, we will have to exchange those in person. Thanks for continuing to write.

  • Sooz

    very good!
    “What it feels like to Rich, my Hair stylist.”..:))

3 Responses to James Altucher headlines that could have gone another way.

  1. Ha, this is hilarious. How about “the time I screwed Yasser Arafat out of a $2 bill”. You missed that one. Or “10 Unusual THings I learned about Googol” the mathematician.

    • Eradke says:

      There were some more brutal ones that I left out, we will have to exchange those in person. Thanks for continuing to write.

  2. Sooz says:

    very good!
    “What it feels like to Rich, my Hair stylist.”..:))

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